Sexual violence and abuse tend to be interchangeable terms which can be confusing. That’s because not all sexual abuse or coercion is violent.

But they are all unwanted acts.

Some people have said that that sometimes unwanted kissing didn’t seem too bad. But that led to pressure to carry out unwanted sexual acts, then the unwanted kissing felt very different. It was unwanted, abusive and completely negated their wishes. The kissing could take place in public, in front of family and children or friends and felt wrong. They felt trapped and that it was them making the ‘scene’ if they tried to pull away. People did not understand that the kisses were an act of coercion and control.

Sexual violence, abuse and coercion is any unwanted act, regardless of sex or gender. It includes rape or attempted rape, refusal to allow birth control, not using condoms and engaging in unsafe sex. Forcing a person to take part in sexual activities in exchange for something, which could be money, food, clothing.

It can also be about threatening to ‘out’ someone if they don’t engage in sexual acts and using sexual insults.

Impact of sexual violence